More TV and Stuff

So, the crummy times continue. My newest nephew Ry, who is only 1 month old, is in the hospital. They think he might have pneumonia. My mother died from pneumonia. I'm not pleased.

And I still have to unearth my house from all of the empty cardboard boxes and Play-Doh containers that have taken over. And my daughter, sweet little cranky H, just scratched my face with a Disney Movie Rewards movie insert from her copy of High School Musical, while she gleefully says "We can watch this movie forever!" We have been watching this movie forever, hence the DVD. I need the 2 hours off of my DVR. 24 and Battlestar Galatica are returning, and we still haven't started Sanctuary, Fringe, or this season of Sarah Connor Chronicles. But we are down to only 5 episodes of Ninja Warrior, 5 episodes of Star Wars: The Clone Wars, and one Supernanny. Which we might stop watching, because H acts up when she sees the naughy children. And I would gladly delete all 5 Phineas and Ferbs. Yes, it's amusing, yes a lot of the humor goes over the head of the children, but when your 3 year old can quote the shows, and you can recite them verbatim, it's time for something new!

Curse you Perry the Platypus!

More Woes

So, I let my guard down the other day and said "I hope we can make it through the rest of the year without any catastrophes." There was 9 days left in the year so it didn't seem that unrealistic. Shall we review what has happened since I said that on Monday?

My father-in-law drove his Explorer off the freeway and his a construction vehicle and it took the Highway Patrol 5 hours to get to him. Five hours.

My brother Nate was rear ended in the K-Mart parking lot while he was getting into his car. Nate is currently a police officer, so it was a good thing he wasn't in Springville, or they would have had to call the Highway Patrol and they seem rather busy right now.

I have a pink soft cast on my foot. When the podiatrist said he was going to wrap up my foot, I really thought he was talking Ace bandage, so when he brought out the goopy gauzy stuff I was a little surprised. So I can't get my foot wet for 3 days and it really isn't very comfortable. And I made the mistake of not getting one of the drivy carts at Wal-mart yesterday right after the cast was put on and really made my foot hurt. I honestly couldn't tell you how I hurt it, but there's foot pain and it hurts, and this is supposed to pull everything back where it goes. And I'm running out of Ibuprofen.

And apparently I'm making up words. At least there have been no ER trips this week. You would think that wouldn't be a big deal, but lately it is.

2008 in Review. Bring on 2009!

So, this has been a crappy year. To recap:

January--I think this was the only month that didn't contain some sort of disaster. We were in Vegas at the beginning of the month. I think that's the perfect time to go to Vegas. There's no snow in Vegas. And I finally found a McDonalds with a playland across from the Galleria Mall, so there's somewhere for H and I to go on Fridays after we've checked out of our hotel.

February-This was when the crap began to hit the fan--we just didn't know how much crap was coming our way! My mom had her mini stroke--I had to meet my parents at the ER--my mom never recovered. I had the crappiest birthday since the time I was six and had the chicken pox and my birthday party got canceled. I asked for a birthday do-over, but because of my mom's health that never happened. On the plus side, Dad brought me a Hello Kitty birthday balloon because my mom was worried about my birthday. It's nice to know Dad thinks I'm 3.

March-Worst month ever! My mom spent a week in the hospital, part of it in the ICU, and the day after she came home she died. We were supposed to go on vacation, and instead I buried my mother. I feel so old. As my dad put it, now I'm half of an orphan. I aged at least 10 years that month. No gray hairs yet, but I think the bags under my eyes are here to stay. I had one of life's defining moments when I spoke at my mother's funeral. Guess I'm an adult now.

April-In April we went to a cabin in Midway with my dad for Spring Break. He was still devastated by the loss of my mom. Apparently April is a little early for cabining--yeah, I know that's not a word. Don't start. We had to hike in with our stuff because the road to the cabin was still covered in snow. The pipes froze. H got sick. The DVD player didn't work--well, until Brent got there and worked his technological magic. Anything that could have gone wrong did. A trip to remember.

May-I opted out of Mother's Day this year. Skipped church, took flowers to my moms grave. The headstone was in--we got a bench. I think it looks great, and I'm so glad I didn't let them use Arial font on the stone. Arial sucks. Went to Bear Lake with Brent, H and Dad. That was fun.

June-My mother's birthday was in June--took flowers to her grave. Pretty much it. The home alarm went off by accident, cops showed up.

July-Mike got married! High point of the year! We had a lovely garden wedding, H was the cutest flower girl ever, and my heart stopped when she wandered off during the reception. I'm excellent in a crisis, but this time I froze. Brent found her around the block in someone's garage. Good thing my dad lives in a great neighborhood. Sent her home with the in-laws--why my mother-in-law brought her to our house, I don't know, but she set off our home alarm and the cops showed up, and hauled the neighbors dog to the pound and gave them a fine. Ah, memories.

August-Brent's family reunion. Don't travel with family. Just don't. H turned 3 and started preschool.

September-Can you believe we've been married 14 years? Seriously, 14 years. I know, it's crazy. Went to Park City, stayed at the Summit Watch Marriott, and found a little piece of heaven. H got hooked on crafts because everday we did crafts as part of the MAZE program.

October-Halloween! A respite from crap! I went as Princess Leia, Brent was Indiana Jones and H alternated between a princess and last year's poodle costume. Brent and H went a little crazy decorating the yard. I started a low sugar, low fat kick to lose weight. I don't want to be a diabetic like my dad. Plus, my pants don't fit.

November-Got a speeding ticket on the way home from planning commission meeting--there went the time I was saving. H barfed on me when we got home. H barfed on me when we were boarding the plane the next day. H barfed on me at the rental agency, at the wedding rehearsal for Brent's brothers wedding, and at the restaurant during the rehearsal dinner. Oh, and at the hotel the next day--day of the wedding. Day after the wedding we got in a car accident. Got home, the kitchen faucet was acting up, smoke alarms needed to be changed--that's a coming home from a trip tradition. Then, to cap the whole crap month off, my desktop computer conked out. Bit the big one. Post toasty. I get relagated to my laptop. And I can't access most of my photos--some are still on the E drive because the auto backup wasn't getting done. At least the drive hasn't crashed.

December-The month is young, but I've seen the x-rays from the accident--H was out 1/2", she's back in and should recover beautifully. Me--well, when the chiropractor says "you look like hell" and says "that's not normal" after reviewing your x-ray, well, you can tell I'm in for a long ride. High point of the month--H is excited for Christmas. Low point--H cried the other night because it was her Uncle Mike at the door and not Santa. Oh, and Nate's wife is in the hospital having her gallbladder out as I type this. What a year. To quote Bart Simpson "It's craptacular."

Some Days You Are Just Mad

And on other days you're so pissed you could scream and or hit someone. Or shoot someone. Perhaps it's a good thing I don't have a concealed weapons permit. Yet. Today is one of those days. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

More Slacking

I have stuff I should be doing. I should be finding the pants I'm going to wear tomorrow--at least the shirt is picked out. I may be a slacker, but I generally try to lay out the next days outfits before I go to bed. And I did remember to take Valerian--maybe an hour later than I meant to, but I did it. I usually forgo sleep aids when it's just me and H, but I drank 64 ozs. of Diet Dr. Pepper today--hey, it kept the migraine under control--and I needed something to counteract it.

H and I finally got our first chiropractic adjustments after the accident. You may wonder why it took so long? Well, Dr. Chapman was moving offices during this whole ordeal and the x-ray machine wasn't hooked up. Today was the first day it was up and running. You may wonder why I didn't just see someone else. Visit www.nucca.org and it might answer your question. It's the best form of chiropractic and there's only 3 doctors in Utah that practice it. The other one I've gone to is on maternity leave.

H and I were quite out--my x-rays show C1 went one way and C2 went another and there's a weird kink in my neck that shouldn't be there. I actually feel a lot better now that I'm back in. Hopefully H will regain her sweet self now that she's in again.

Anyway, I have lots of housework to do, Christmas stuff to do, newspaper stuff to do, and I really don't want to do any of it. What I want to do is watch CSI on the DVR, but I don't have any episodes on it and H is still awake.

I guess I'd better go finish getting ready for tomorrow. We have a follow-up visit to the chiropractor, H has preschool, and I have too much to do to continue wasting time. Seriously. I'm going. I'm getting up right now. For reals.

The Laptops Are Multiplying...

The other day I realized laptops were taking over my house. There was one on the dining room table--mine. There was one on a tv tray in front of the couch--Brent's. And then was another one on Brent's lap--my brother Mike's. It seriously looked as if we lived in a Dell showroom.

Brent fixed Mike's laptop--note to Mike be more careful with your laptop--it has all your invoices and wedding pictures, not to mention pictures of my nephew--so it's no longer hosed. And Brent left to go to Denver, leaving me with two laptops. And then Mike got back from Roosevelt and picked up his laptop, leaving me with just one. Figures it would be the slowest one...

O Happy Day!

I found my Guns N Roses Greatest Hits CD! It's been missing for over a year! It was in the Lindsay's Mega Happy Fun Disc IV case under Mega Happy Fun Disc 6. Now I can get the house cleaned. Nothing says a clean house like GNR.

Slacking

You know, it's amazing how one day of slacking off on the housework turns your house into a crap shack. The counters are covered, the table is covered with Christmas stuff, the mail, Strawberry Shortcake pals, car insurance paperwork, and my laptop, since my desktop decided to die on Sunday. At least we were able to salvage the few things I needed that were on the C: drive--all my photos were safely on the E: drive and somewhat backed up on our external harddrive, other than the last few months because apparently the stupid media computer that I have always secretly hated died.

At any rate, it has complicated matters somewhat, because now half of the dining room table is taken up with laptops, and I only have one monitor and I've gotten quite accustomed to two. Could I squeeze any more forms of to in that sentence? Two, to, too--I'm out.

At any rate, I've been slacking because I just frankly don't feel like loading the dishwasher, washing clothes, or picking up after myself. I'm not excited for Christmas--I'm just down.

So, I'm off to sit in my recliner, reading the new David Baldacci, and waiting for Spring to come.

Thankful For???

So I survived Thanksgiving. The feast itself was great. Tender, juicy turkey, Nate's mashed potatoes (even though Dad made them), the gravy was excellent, and Chandra made orange rolls and I had two! And no one but me knew that there was Splenda in the chocolate banana cream pie.

It was after we got home things started to fall apart. First I found H coloring on my bedspread with a marker. Yes, she had a piece of paper between the marker and the bedspread, but with a 3-year-old that's really no help. She had pushed it through the paper and got gray ink on my bedspread. My bedspread that my mother made. My bedspread that I had to go with my mother to 37,000 fabric stores--okay, probably 5--to get the fabric for. This bedspread cannot be replaced and I'm not sure if you can fix a quilt once it's quilted. I was furious. Fortunately, Brent was home, cooler heads prevailed, H survived to get into mischief another day and Brent got the ink out of the bedspread. Thank you very much, Tide to Go.

Then we find out that there are only 3 episodes left of Stargate Atlantis and then it's the series finale. What? Three episodes and that's it? Why is this the first I'm hearing about this? What am I going to DVR on Friday nights? And ABC Family just started Season One over on their Gilmore Girls reruns. I guess they don't have rights to air the final season yet. Why did I just watch 6 seasons of reruns if we're not going to see the final season? Not that it was that good, but still. Oh well, with Gilmore Girls starting over that frees up 5 hours of my week and 5 hours on my DVR. Perhaps now I'll finish my lifelong goal of watching every episode of the X-files in order. Or not.

Black & White

It came to my attention that all of my dress clothes are black and white, with the exception of one navy blue skirt. Everything else, black, white, white, black, black and white, or gray--a sweater. I wonder how that happened...oh right, I kept buying black and white because that's all I liked. When will brown go away? I hate brown. It does seem that navy blue has come back for a bit--I'd better stock up.

Why am I thinking about my clothes? It's because I spent half of the afternoon folding laundry, throwing away most of the dish rags--what can I say, some of them I got at my bridal shower, and they pretty much stink--filling up a size 5 diaper box of H's clothes to give to DI, along with some of Brent's pants. Brent pretty much only wears black pants, with the occasional blue jeans on Saturday, so he doesn't need 5 pairs of blue jeans. One, possibly two is fine.

And how on earth do three people have enough socks to overfill a laundry basket? One of us is three-years-old? I suppose I'd better just DI the socks H has outgrown. That little girl--always growing out of her clothes. And as much as it pains me to donate hardly worn Gymboree clothes, room must be made in her closet. And her closet needs an overhaul, because Brent is always complaining that he can't find clothes for her. Hmm...usually an outfit is laying on her changing table, and her pajamas are always in a stack. I guess they need to be labeled pajamas.

Brent is right, though, her closet does need redoing. Since she's starting to dress herself, and express interest in potty training, methinks her clothes and training pants need to be where she can reach them. So, the toys in bins are coming out--maybe I can finally get rid of that stupid Leappad--and clothes bins are going in. I'll put some stickers on them, with pictures of what goes where. In theory, that should help Brent out. In reality, he'll continue to dress her in things that are too small, too big, still have the tag on, and don't really match. Or let her wear her princess dress.

The Fun Continues

I had just such a fun week last week. On Monday H and I went to music class, then Bajio--mmmm....Bajio--and then I went to the dermatologist and had 3 moles removed. Super fun, especially since one of them requires a special ointment twice a day, which is so fun because it's on the back of my neck and I can't really reach it and Brent was in Florida all week. Not the warm part though, hee hee hee.

On Tuesday I took H to preschool, at lunch at Fat Jacks, ran 6 diaper boxes full of clothes, and one ergonomic keyboard that works fine it's just beige and my new one is black to DI, and then went to the chiropractor where it took 2 hours and we still haven't been adjusted. The good news is that H is only out by 1/2". I am seriously messed up, which is almost funny considering the chiropractor told me in March that he's seen people who were hit by a truck that were in better condition than I was. Ah, emotional trauma. So, we're still waiting for x-rays to be analyzed and I had darn well better get in during the next few days because my shoulder and neck and back really hurt and it makes it hard to sleep!

On Wednesday H went to her grandma's house and I went to the regular doctor for all kinds of fun tests, including diabetes and cholesterol and such. Then we worked on cleaning the house up and unpacking.

Thursday, H went to preschool, and then we went shopping with my dad. We had lunch at Bajio again--H loves rice and beans. We also went by the cemetery because H has decided her grammy is coming back, and it's so hard to explain death to a 3-year-old. I'm glad she remembers her grammy. I'm glad she loves her grammy. But it breaks my heart that my mom is gone and H will grow up with out her. This led me into the crying jag that was Friday. I just can't believe my mom is gone. Seriously.

On Saturday, we went to Outback, and the server messed up everyone's bill. And they so didn't give me a rare steak--more like completely dead. Okay, probably medium, but I said rare, dang it! On the plus side, I got to hold one of my new nephews. And we went to Barnes and Nobles and I got a new calender for 2009--Wonders of the World, since you can't get a Far Side Wall Calender anymore. And we watched Stargate SG-1 Continuum. I will miss Ba'al. Brent and I are plotting out mean things to say about SG-1 over the holidays, even though we did enjoy it immensely when it was on. But we, as the only ones on Brent's side who have cable, have moved on to Stargate Atlantis, and we're at least one season ahead of everyone since they have to wait for it to come to DVD. Hee hee hee...I love Dish. And I love the DVR. And I love that we have 3 hours of Atlantis on the DVR.

Cold November Rain

So, I'm back from Chicago. Cold, cold, dreary, bitter weather out there. The second half of the trip was great. No catastrophes--Nauvoo is not nearly as cold as Chicago. The only downside was everything in Nauvoo closes at 5:00, except the town bar, which closes at 8:00. Oh well, seeing Church History locations was great.

But the first half of the trip--oh my. First, the night before the trip I got a speeding ticket on the way home from the Planning Commission Meeting. Lucky for me, the nice officer cut the ticket down from 25 over (apparently Arrowhead is only 40 mph not 50) to 9 over, which was nice. When I got home, H barfed on me. Yes, my darling 3 year old daughter came down with a 24 hour flu bug the night before we flew out. So the next day she barfed when we were boarding, she barfed at the rental car counter, she barfed at the wedding rehearsal dinner, she barfed at the restaurant after the rehearsal, and she barfed the day of the wedding. Need I mention that she pushed away everything I tried to get her to barf into, so we went through all of our packed clothes in 3 days? Meaning, that just a few short days into the trip we had to do laundry.

So, we load up the mini-van (we had 6 people in our group), and we head to my newly married brother-in-laws house to do laundry. We get rear-ended on the way over by a Ford F250, driven by a young driver who was going too fast on a wet, rainy day. The back window of the minivan shatters. It's a very cold day. And I happened to be taking a swig of Diet Dr. Pepper right when the truck slams into us, so I, and the front of the minivan, get drenched in soda. I end up wearing my BILs Navy sweats the rest of the day, making me look like everyone else in the area. So we blow all of Saturday waiting for a replacement minivan and going to the ER, because everyone is sore and Brent's 90 year old grandmother was one of the people in the van.

And did I mention that the accident happened the day before Brent's birthday? And I forgot about his birthday because I was so sore? What a trip. If I didn't have a speeding ticket to go take care of tomorrow, I'd be super glad to be home.

Another Hiatus

I love going on trips! So I'm off to Chicago with a detour down to Nauvoo. Other than the fact I've got a sinus infection, I'm pretty excited for this trip. Now if you'll excuse me, I have packing to do.

On Super Powers

Since tomorrow is Halloween, and since I spend a lot of time thinking about this topic, now seems as good a time as any to address super powers. Specifically, I don't think Batman counts as a super hero. Hero, yes. Super, not so much. He doesn't have any special powers. He has awesome gadgets, powerful training, and a fancy smancy car, but he doesn't have the ability to read minds, turn things into ice, shoot spiderwebs out of his hands, or fly. Although it seems like all of the villains he fights do have super powers.

Anyway, if I had super powers, I would probably use them for evil. Brent and I were just discussing this the other day--which of the X-Men would you want to be? I can't stand Wolverine--seriously, I couldn't stand him in the cartoon back in the day when I used to watch it on Saturday mornings before Saved By the Bell came on, and I certainly couldn't stand him during the movies. And let's not get started on the disappointment during the movies of how the whole Dark Phoenix story line was handled, or not handled. And did they have to kill Cyclops? And where was Gambit? He was my favorite X-man. Anyway, in that universe, I think I'd want to be Magneto. He had really powerful powers, and he used them for evil! I know, the villains usually end up in jail, or dead, or at the very least defeated vowing vengeance, but it seems like they have more fun than the namby pamby heroes that are always having to save the day and fight evil. And I must say, I liked Spiderman a lot better when he was walking the dark side of the line, except for that horrible dance number, which pretty much ruined Spiderman 3. Of course, I've never really been much of a Spidey fan--if you want to judge which superheroes are the whiniest, Spiderman is going to get my vote.

And if you want to know the stupidest superpower--definitely the Thing. I mean, he's a big pile of rocks and he can wreck stuff and is strong, but he's a big pile of rocks! That's almost as stupid as Rogues superpower--draining other powers and not being able to touch anyone.

But that's just what I think.

Random Stuff

So, my eye problem is still a problem. Apparently I have an astigmatism in one eye, but it's so minor that it's not worth getting glasses for. So right now I have to make a list of what makes my eyes hurt, and wear reading glasses while using the computer, which stretches the eye strain out to hitting after 20 minutes instead of 5. Which reminds me, why am I writing a stupid blog post when I'm supposed to be writing about the ALA Mock Disaster drill? It's due in 15 minutes.

I have a new nephew--my brother Nate is now a daddy. Poor little guy. Baby S is in the NICU with an infection. H is upset because Baby S barfed on his blanket and himself, but she got to see him through the window.

Brent has all his employees in town this week so he's barely been home, but today is Spouse Appreciation Day and as far as I know he's been able to swing it so he can attend. So in a few hours I'll be at Color Me Mine painting plates or something. I deserve a break--I've done the corporate wife thing all week, including making homemade cookies and prize bags for bowling night and as I write this I'm wearing a company shirt so I can be Mrs. Brent at the event. But seriously, it's all good.

October hasn't been too bad--I don't want to jinx it, because October is traditionally a horrible month for our family. So far the worst thing is Baby S being in the NICU, and my brother Ryan who is on his mission got flashed. I suppose that's better than the time someone threw a rock at him.

I'd better go. I've got an article to file and H will be wanting lunch and a costume change. Right now she's Snow White. Yes, the costume is a little big. It's for a 4 year-old, and she's 3. But Uncle Mike gave her the costume for her birthday, and she adores Uncle Mike.

I'm Finally Getting Lost

So, I'm pretty late getting on the Lost bandwagon, but I must say it's a compelling show. And not just because Sawyer is hot--which he is--but it's an intriguing idea for the show. Brent got hooked on it right before he had his emergency colon surgery--he watched two seasons of Lost while he was septic, which helps explain some of the crazy nightmares he had while in the ICU. Too much Lost in a short time, plus he did have a tremendous infection to fight off. In fact, we're pretty lucky that the mega IV antibiotics worked on him. But anyway, while he was watching two seasons of Lost, I was taking care of H and trying not to get sick. Hey, a bad flu was going around and I didn't want to catch it. At the time, we didn't know he had diverticulitis and that anything was rupturing inside his body, and that it wasn't catching. So really, I only saw bits and pieces of this crazy Lost show. But he was hooked.

So I watched last season with him, and in order to not be completely clueless and confused as to what is going on, I am watching Lost from the beginning now that it's airing on SciFi. I do realize that we have two seasons that I could watch on the Media Shuttle--basically a computer that doesn't keep time well which is why we ended up getting the DVR instead of using it, because at the time, you would lose the last 3 minutes of your show. Anyway, I could watch Lost using the media shuttle--you can browse the internet using that stupid thing, but it requires 3 remotes to get to it, including the tv remote, and it's just too much work to get out of the recliner to reboot it when it locks up, like it does. If we hadn't been doing a beta-test for the stupid thing, Brent probably wouldn't have gotten hooked on Lost.

Anyway, the point is, you shouldn't watch Lost right before bed. It brings on really weird dreams. Which is why I usually watch it during H's naps. Except H is starting to not want to nap in the afternoons. Except for today, but she fell asleep on the family room floor, and I really needed to catch up on laundry. Monday used to be chore day, but now her music class is on Monday mornings, and we end up blowing the whole day, because we drive to Springville--what can I say, I enrolled her at Art City Music Academy. Yes, I realize she's 3. How many 3 year olds do you know that can recognize whole notes, quarter notes, and quarter rests, hmm? I know of 3, and they're in her class. And she can find do, re, and mi on the keyboard. But enough bragging about my exceptional kid. After we got to music class, we usually stop by my office--yes, at some point I'll really quit that job for good--and then we go out to eat, and usually shopping, and by the time we get home we don't want to do chores. But we do want to watch tv. And Lost is too intense for a 3-year-old. Oh well, I guess I'll squeeze it in at night.

Fake Thanksgiving

So, tonight was Fake Thanksgiving. We had turkey, potatoes, gravy, corn, cranberry sauce, rolls, stuffing, and two types of pie--lemon meringue and chocolate banana cream. The only thing missing was my brother Ryan, who is still on his mission, and my mom, who is not coming back from the grave, as far as we know.

But it was the first Fake Thanksgiving of the year--we always do a trial run before the big day, and yes, I am talking about Halloween. Okay, some years Fake Thanksgiving has been right before the real Thanksgiving, or after Thanksgiving, depending on if we ended up with any turkey leftovers or not. Anyway, it is a fun tradition, and I'm pretty certain we're the only family with a Fake Holiday.

Hiatus

Hopefully I spelled hiatus right. Anyway, I am on a break from blogging because I can't sit at a computer for more than 10-15 minutes without my eyes hurting, and until I get that sorted out computer time is reserved for e-mail and newspaper business. Even planning my next vacation is on hold, until I get this straightened out.

What Was I Thinking?

Vegas is hot. I forgot that. Glad to be home. And why did I drive down on Thursday to turn around and come home on Saturday? Oh right, Brent is out of town for the next 2 weeks and this was pretty much the only time we'll see him. So I suppose the drive was worth it.

And I found out gas is at least 30 cents cheaper a gallon in Vegas. Figure that one out.

Mega Happy Fun Disc?

I'm listening to Lindsay's Mega Happy Fun Disc III because I am pretty bummed today. Many factors, including I miss my mom and everyone around me is pregnant and I'm sick of it. But that's not the point of this post. The point is, MHFD III is fairly depressing for something that's a Mega Happy Fun Disc. It includes:

Route 66 - Depeche Mode (How can you not be depressed listening to Depeche Mode?)
Touch Her Madly - The Doors
Don't Bring Me Down - ELO (Yes, there's a lot of classic rock on this disc, and classic rock is fairly depressing)
Hotel California - The Eagles
Part of Me, Part of You - Glenn Fry (Depressing for numerous reasons, not including my mom used to play this on the guitar because of her brother, my uncle, who drowned on a family river run 10 years ago)
Armageddon It - Def Leppard (Don't ask)
Dogs of Lust - The The
Holiday - The Other Ones (Pretty much the only peppy, mega happy song on this disc)
Smells Like Teen Spirit - Nirvana (Because Nirvana is known for its happy songs)
Shame About That - Sara Evans (Wondering why there's country on this disc? Me too.)
Pop Goes the World - Men Without Hats
Love to Hate You - Erasure (Full of sunshine and flowers)
Then What - Clay Walker (Still not sure why the country is there)
Pour Some Sugar on Me - Def Leppard
Afternoons and Coffeespoons - Crash Test Dummies (Because someday I'll wear pajamas in the day time)
God Shuffled His Feet - CTD (Yes, I may be the only person who actually bought the album)

This disc isn't Mega Happy at all! In fact, it's pretty much a turn out the lights and sulk disc. I hate to say it, but the 4th one isn't much better, other than the peppy Blink 182 version of Seasons in the Sun.

I'd better make a new disc. Or iTunes play list, except my iPod says Do not disconnect and last time I disconnected it without it's permission it retaliated by having no battery power when I needed it. So it's a CD for me, because I can't drive to Vegas in my current state of bummed. Hmm...I wonder if we have any G&R...because nothing cheers you up like Welcome to the Jungle.

Ah the DVR

Amazingly enough, it's time for the mid-season finale of Eureka. Personally, I'd be fine if we didn't keep watching Eureka, especially now that Stark is gone, but Brent enjoys it and it's one we can actually watch while H is up, unlike Burn Notice, which is way too violent. That's the reason there are 4 unwatched episodes on the DVR. And there are 5 episodes of Stargate Atlantis, and probably 2 Sarah Connor Chronicles. We actually didn't start watching those until summer, so we had a whole season to watch back to back. Which is one of the joys of DVR. You can save up shows, assuming no one tells you what's going on and spoils them for you, and then when there is a dearth of good programming on, you are set. So we'll probably save Sarah Connor for the summer of 2009, or at least December 2008 while we're waiting for 24 to come back.

Anyway, one of the things I really hate about Eureka, other than it is the most predictable show on television outside of the Doodlebops--Moe always pulls the cord and gets wet--is the blatant product placement. I get it--the ratings are bad, the only way to pay for the show is to turn it into a commercial for Degree Deodorant, but must we have whole episodes with lines like "We stay cool under pressure" "Stay cool under pressure" "When it's hot, wear our stupid deodorant" Okay, that last one I made up, but the point is the product placement is out of hand. I accept some of the responsibility--we skip most of the commercials now that we have the DVR, but we don't skip all of them. Like the Sonic commercials--those crack me up. "I'll be Pepperjack the pirate and you be Cheddar the Accountant." Or my favorite "I'm no good at ice cream math."

Coming Clean

After reading a fellow former classmates post about junior high full of things I had pretty much forgotten/blocked out, I started thinking about the past and things I had blocked out. Such as girls camp. Most of it I have repressed, but I do remember one night that Lisa, Karen and myself decided to stay up late playing Monopoly via flashlight. It was late, and Lisa was very tired. I will admit it--I cheated. Every time Lisa landed on St. Charles place, I charged her $22, even though she owned the property. I don't think I won--I'm pretty certain Karen did, but I've felt guilty about it all these years. Okay, actually, I haven't really felt that guilty at all. In fact, I think it's pretty funny. And I always check my properties when playing Monopoly, just in case someone is trying to pull the same stunt. Actually, we only play Christmasopoly once a year, because once you turn about 14 Monopoly just isn't that fun anymore.

Oh How I Hate You...

Oh Little Touch Leap Pad, how much I hate you. You are noisy, obnoxious, and always underfoot. Half your pieces are missing. The cartridge that matches the book or puzzle is never the one that is plugged in. Even though the ads show children happily playing alone with their Leap Pads, you insist on forcing an adult to supervise/touch all the spots instead of the 3-year-old.

And yet, I can't get rid of you, because every time I try some little girl fishes you out of the DI box. I didn't even buy you, you showed up in a batch of toys dropped off by my sister-in-law. It would appear the only way to get rid of you is to shove you off unto some unsuspecting fool. Who will it be?

Christmas is Coming...

I so need to find a better hiding place for Christmas gifts. My closet is getting crowded, and there is now no room left for my socks because my 3 sock bins are full of gifts! Perhaps it's time to invest in a colored plastic bin, and I could label is something like "old fish tank parts, not Christmas gifts" so that nobody would peek in it.

Seriously, from several years experience I have learned that I must keep all the gifts in one place, otherwise I will find some of them several months after Christmas. Or forget that I was buying gifts throughout the year, and realize that H got 7 wooden puzzle sets for Christmas. And wrapping as you go--not a good idea in our house, because then you forget what it was. That's how I ended up being surprised that someone had given us the original trilogy of Star Wars again--yes, it was me, I bought it, wrapped it, and promptly forgot about it. Now I have it twice, three times if you count the VHS version. At least they finally broke down and put the original versions out on DVD. Because you do not want to get me started on the new ending of Return of the Jedi. Why not just upload a virus to the mothership and have it done with? Original Ewok ending all the way. But that's a blog post of its own.

More Evidence...

If my daughter didn't look a lot like my husband, there would be an easy way to tell they're related. Waking either of them up in the morning is like poking a hibernating grizzly with a stick. Then there's conversations like this:

I pick H up from pre-school. We're driving down the road, when suddenly H says "It's too quiet."

"I can fix that," I say, and the car is soon filled with DaDa's Disneyland. "Is that better?"

"Yes," replies a happy little girl.

We have also had this conversation:

We're in the Durango, waiting for Daddy. I'm flipping through the iPod, picking out some tunes to listen to. I pick Head On from the Jesus and Mary Chain.

"Turn it louder Mommy." H says.

"Is this loud enough?"

"No, louder!" H exclaims.

Just like her Daddy.

Abandon All Hope...

I think that if you're a very bad person, when you die, it isn't St. Peter who greets you. No, standing at the gates of hell you'll be greeted by the Doodlebops, whose singing, dancing, and capering will slowly drive you mad.

An Apology To Caputo's

I feel bad about saying there is no good deli in Utah, because there is one good place. Tony Caputo's at 314 S 300 W in Salt Lake City does have excellent deli. In fact, that's one of the positive factors in going to a NUCCA chiropractor that is located in SLC--Caputo's is just a few blocks down the road. I was absolutely delighted when I realized the proximity of the two.

I apologize if I upset any of the great people at Caputo's, because I have eaten there often and I actually have a menu in my car so I can decide what I want ahead of time in case there's a line. Which there usually is, because everybody loves Caputo's.

The balsamic vinegar that they use is so tasty words fail me to describe it. If you like vinegar, you'll be pleased.

My favorite sandwich is the Caputo, which has: Prosciutto, mortadella, salami, provolone, lettuce, and tomatoes on a hard Italian roll covered with olive oil and balsamic vinegar. I have to say, I'm a sucker for salami. And pastrami. I love pastrami.

And I hope I didn't offend any Italians, because I love Italian food, and their cheeses--the true Italian cheeses, not the stupid rip-off American versions like shelf-stable Parmesan cheese--are among the best in the world.

So, Matt, I hope you accept my apology. And thank you for giving me the comeuppance I deserved. Because I did.

And if there is anyone out there reading this, seriously, stop in at Caputo's next time you're in SLC. You'll be glad you did. You can check out their delicious menu at www.caputosdeli.com.

24 Can't Be Delayed!

I realized a while ago that the reason I don't get a lot of things done is because 98% of my brain is thinking about when 24 is coming back and what will happen and will Jack Bauer have to cut off another head, and how I've gotten pretty desensitized to violence thanks to 24, and how sometimes we have 3 episodes waiting on the DVR because it's much too violent for H to watch now that she's understanding what's on the tv. If she can request specific episodes of Sesame Street, she is definitely too attentive to watch 24. And CSI. And the Sarah Connor Chronicles. And Lost. Possibly Stargate Atlantis. This could explain why we watch so many shows on the Disney Channel. Ah, Life with Derek, you crack me up with your Canadian pronunciation of words like Sorry. Sorey! Hee hee hee. And Phineas and Ferb--pure comic genius. Even H can quote that show. But I digress.

Anyway, whenever I see anything in the paper or TV Guide about possible delays on 24, I get a little upset. I'm still mad about the writer's strike delaying 24 for a whole year! A whole year! A whole year of me being able to barely function because my brain is thinking about 24 when I should be writing articles or driving H to preschool or planning vacations. I could be balancing the checkbook--okay, letting Quicken balance the checkbook, but instead I'm thinking about 24. Granted, there shouldn't be any delay just because filming is taking a hiatus so the writers can figure out how it ends. I thought part of the joy of 24 was when they started filming they weren't sure how it ends.

Stupid writers. First they wreck last years tv season, and now they're getting me worried about next season. If I don't see new episodes of 24 soon I'm going to lose all ability to function! For example, right now I really need to unpack from our short jaunt up to Park City, but here I am, thinking about 24. I also need to finish editing my article on this month's School Board meeting, and upload pictures from the retirement luau (complete with a roasted pig H thought was a dog) that I attended yesterday. But that would require more than the 2% of brain power available that's not taken up with thoughts of 24. Specifically, will they finally kill off Jack's daughter? Oh how I hate her. But listing the reasons could take a post of its own.

Stuff I Hate

I really hate the new Utah license plates. Especially the new ski plate. The font for Utah is terrible--I can't see it without cringing. The shade of red that is underneath it is awful--it's hardly a red, more of a red orange, and I think it offends the senses. And the new motto--Life Elevated? What happened to the classic Ski Utah plate with it's timeless motto The Greatest Snow on Earth? I don't even ski and I prefer that plate. So much so, that on my last two vehicles I have requested that plate over the Centennial Arch Plate. Plus the car is red, and the red on Ski matched the car. Maybe it's just me.

I hate microwave popcorn. It does not matter which brand, I hate them all equally. Except ACT II caramel popcorn, which you can't get at the Payson Wal-Mart so I have to pick it up in Vegas.

Playgrounds without swings. Playgrounds without baby swings. Playgrounds with one baby swing that is broken.

Hotels without Tivo. Okay, that's not true. I hate the fact that once you get used to being able to pause live television you can't go back to regular tv without a lot of moaning and groaning. Even from the 3-year old. Especially from the 3-year old. "Sweetie, the Marriott doesn't have Sesame Street available any time of the day like we do at home. It's like Grandpa's house."

Coleslaw. It's just nasty. Except the delicious sidedish at McDonald's Bistro Gourmet restaurants in Orlando, Florida.

The fact that there are no Bistro Gourmet restaurants anywhere near Utah--only in Orlando.

The nearest Popeye's is in Mesquite, Nevada.

You can't get good deli in Utah. You can barely get passable deli in Utah. One place that I'm aware of carries Boars Head meat. One place. And it's not Caputo's. That's good deli, but it's Italian deli so it doesn't count.

Shopping for shoes. Apparently no one who is a size 6 has a wide foot but me--or everyone does. Either way, I can never find shoes in the right size.

Basic Dish doesn't include G4.

The fact that gas costs at least 30 cents less in Colorado than it does in Utah.

The Blimpie on 1300 South in Salt Lake--they don't have the good Blimpie pickles. That's half the reason to go to Blimpie. The other half is the delicious spicy mustard and delicious oil and vinegar. Mmm...Blimpie.

There's no Blimpie in Utah County that I am aware of. All the Blimpies in Provo shut down. One is now a Carl's jr, one got knocked down, and one is a Papa Murphy's and the Enter and Exit signs are the old Blimpie signs and it makes me sad everytime I see it, which is basically everytime I am on University Ave.

Hmm...a large percentage of things I hate have to do with fast food. Strange. Maybe I eat at too many fast food restaurants. Add that to the list--fast food.

There Was A Time...

There was a time when my things stayed in great shape, and the printer stayed on. There was a time when you could walk through my house without tripping over blocks, tiaras, or dollies. There was even a time when you wouldn't find sippy cups full of mystery liquid in various places in the house. (I threw the scary one that had been in the garage for who knows long straight away.)

There was a time when if the Durango was driving weird we'd take it to a mechanic. Now, we check to see if H pushed the 4-wheel drive button when she was playing in the front seat, because most of the time that's the problem.

There was a time when I slept in on weekends, got enough sleep on weeknights, and had something that was known as disposable income. Now that income is spent on disposable diapers.

There was a time I could leave the See's Chocolates box in plain sight without it being compromised. Now it is in a secret hiding place known only to me.

Life with H is certainly interesting--there is never a dull moment.

There was a time where I would say "Don't eat that, it fell on the ground." Now I will say "It's only been on the ground for 10 seconds. You wanted that hot dog, you eat it." (Actual story from lunch today at Diamond Grill. Love that Malibu Chicken sandwich.)

There was a time when I may have been able to discuss politics and engage in lively banter with other people. Now I'm fully prepared to debate whether or not changing Bert & Ernie to claymation was a good idea. (I don't think it is.) And let's not even get into what is wrong with Handy Manny. (Why doesn't he run off with Kelly from the hardware store already, leaving the tools behind?)

There was a time when a night out meant a sit-down restaurant and perhaps a movie or mini-golf. A night out now is dinner at Taco Time and a trip to Wal-Mart.

As my mother would say, there is a time for everything. A time will come when I'm well-rested enough to pay enough attention to the world around me and know what is going on. I'll be able to converse intelligently about something other than the upcoming Fox tv schedule, or awesome cable shows like Burn Notice and Ninja Warrior. I might hit a time when I don't have the East and West Coast Disney Channel schedules memorized. I might forget that Sesame Street is on at 1:00--a feat considering we have a DVR and I don't pay too much attention to what is on when because I don't have to once the timer is set.

But until that time comes, I'm going to spend as much time with my little 3-year-old as I can. Even if it means getting up at 8:00am on vacation to take her finger painting at the Marriott Maze program. Which I did. And she loved it. And now I've got 4 beautiful works of art, one of which is going in her room, one on the fridge, and two are going to Grandma and Grandpa's houses for Christmas gifts.

As Billy Joel says, "This is the time to remember, 'cause it will not last forever."

Can You Stand the Excitement?

Last night was the monthly meeting of the Spanish Fork Planning Commission. I am so lucky I get to cover it for the Spanish Fork News. At least this month it didn't drag on and on and on--no, this month there was hardly anything on the agenda and I was only 2 minutes late and had missed to first couple of agenda items. But there was a good debate on whether or not to annex a property that is on Riverbottoms road into the city, so that will give me something to write about. I just have to find time. While H is at pre-school? After I pick H up from pre-school? During her nap--ah, that blessed time of 2 1/2 hours in the afternoon where she sleeps and then awakens refreshed and happy again? And when am I supposed to squeeze in loading the Durango with all the food and assorted items I have to take to Enrichment tonight? Which reminds me, I have to call everyone who signed up to bring food. I got the list at 5:15 last night. 15 minutes before I was leaving to take H to my dad's so I could go to Planning Commission. There was no time to call anyone.

And Friday morning is out--the article is due at 12:00 and I'm taking H on a playdate with a friend from high school--one of the few friends I've remained in touch with over the years. Plus, Friday I have to bake cookies shaped like onesies and bibs for my sister-in-laws baby shower that I'm hosting on Saturday, and go set up the yard for the shower. It had better be good weather, because I want to have one more event in my mother's rose garden before it gets too cold.

I do this to myself--it is my own fault I'm too busy. When will I learn to slow down? Probably when I'm dead.

(The picture is of H at my brother Mike's wedding July 5th. She was the cutest flower girl ever, and had so much fun skipping down the secret garden path, until she got bored and wandered off and we found her around the block in a neighbor's garage. But that's another story.)

The Coolest Thing On TV. Ever.

So, we are completely addicted to Ninja Warrior. We don't actually have G4 because we have America's Top 100 on Dish (love the Dish. If you sign up for Dish, please reference me so I get my next months bill free) and it doesn't include G4. But my dad has Spanish Fork Cable Network, and it has G4. Fortunately, right after we discovered the joy and wonder that is Ninja Warrior, Dish ran G4 as a free preview for the month, enabling me to DVR over 25 episodes of Ninja Warrior, including competition 17 where Makoto Nagano finally triumphs over stage 4. Only two people have even beaten the whole course. Two.

The best part about Ninja Warrior is watching people fall into the muddy water below. This is just one of the reasons I think Ninja Warrior is most exciting and interesting than the Olympics. At the Olympics, athletes train for one, maybe three related events. In Ninja Warrior, you have to be strong, balanced, and fast. And they have Olympians who can't do the course! Medal Winning Olympians who can't even finish stage 1, although the Warped Wall has taken out many a worthy contender. And wouldn't the Olympics be more exciting if when a gymnast went out of bounds during a performance they fell in water and were eliminated?

My personal favorite is Mr. Octopus, this old guy who is in great shape for his age, but who rarely makes it past the first obstacle, and goes right in the drink. I think I'm even beginning to learn Japanese from watching Ninja Warrior. For example, Jump Hang is Jump Hanga in Japanese. And Spider Walk is Spider Walka.

My 3-year-old daughter also loves Ninja Warrior. To the point that when she sees playground equipment, towel racks, or stair railings she thinks it's the Ninja Warrior course and she has to go and do it. One time her dollies were even doing Ninja Warrior.

I tell you, it's great fun, and it's really funny when we ask H what she would like to watch before bed. "Life With Derek? Hannah Montana?" and we hear "Ninja Warrior."

Is Everyday Halloween?

Halloween is just around the corner, which brings back the age-old question of at what age it is okay to expose your child to Ministry. You see, now that there is a ward Trunk Or Treat instead of the traditional trick or treat where you go to the neighbors and perhaps get an apple with razor blades in it, everyone gathers at the church house to hand candy out. And each year (okay, this will be our second year of actually going) my husband and I discuss creating a special Halloween playlist just for the occasion. We also debate taking the car so we can have the rockingest trunk in the parking lot, since it's the one with the 12 in the trunk and we still haven't gotten around to putting a sub in the Lumbering Ox, and to be honest, we probably never will. Although we will figure out why the back speakers aren't working, and why the front drivers side speakers are getting quiet. Perhaps I need new speakers? These are at least 10 years old, after all.

But getting back to the original question--whether or not it is okay to add Every Day Is Like Halloween to the playlist. I say it is, Brent says it probably isn't, and at some point we need to get out the liner sheet and figure it out. If the playlists on the home MP3 player hadn't conked, except for Alternative 1 for some reason, I could tell you what was on last year's Halloween playlist. Pretty certain it was mainly loaded with Oingo Boingo--what can I saw, Brent is a huge Elfman fan--and it would have had anything off of New Wave Halloween that didn't have inappropriate language, such as one of the five songs named Halloween. And of course Time Warp from Rocky Horror. And I think Feed My Frankenstein by Alice Cooper. And the ever cheesy A Nightmare on My Street by none other than the Fresh Prince and Jazzy Jeff. And Pet Sematary by the Ramones. And probably the Batman theme, from the Batman movie with Michael Keaton--I mentioned the Elfman thing, right?

Anyway, I'm going to have to rebuild the playlist, which brings me back to the question of if it's okay to let a 3 year old listen to Ministry. As a former DJ, I feel it's my responsibility to expose her to a wide range of tunes, spanning classical to classic rock to classic alternative. In fact, just today we listened to the Itsy Bitsy Spider, including the Big Fat Spider and Teensy Eensy spider verses, and then Brent switched to the radio and we decided Billy Idol is an important part of music education also.

I think I'll put it in.

Pre-School

Now that my daughter has started pre-school, I might actually have time to update this blog more than once every few months.

H was super brave when she went to pre-school. She didn't want me to walk her in--heck, she didn't even want me to drive her. She walked right in, turned and went down the stairs. I know, because I followed her with the camera so I could get pictures for her Daddy. I was brave too, I didn't cry until she was safely inside and I was back inside the Lumbering Ox...er, Durango. By the way, we got the shake fixed so now it rides great. I only owe Amex $900, but the Durango rides smooth.

Anyway, I have to stop listening to ABBA for awhile, because as I'm watching my precious girl go to pre-school, wearing her Disney Princesses back-pack which is holding the Disney Princess pencil case and the High School Musical folder, all I can think of it lyrics from Slipping Thru My Fingers.

Schoolbag in hand, she leaves home in the early morning
Waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile
I watch her go with a surge of that well-known sadness
And I have to sit down for a while
The feeling that I'm losing her forever
And without really entering her world
I'm glad whenever I can share her laughter
That funny little girl

Slipping through my fingers all the time
I try to capture every minute
The feeling in it
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Do I really see what's in her mind
Each time I think I'm close to knowing
She keeps on growing
Slipping through my fingers all the time

So of course I'm bawling all the way home. I can't help it. We waited over 10 years for H to show up, and when I finally got pregnant I was 10 weeks along and throwing up before I even realized it. To be fair, my Grandpa had just died so I thought it was grief messing with my appetite, although I should have realized when I was losing weight and my waist was getting bigger than something was up. Anyway, I may be a little overprotective and hyper-vigilant, and unable to sympathize with mothers who are so excited to drop their kids off at pre-school that they are doing the happy dance and saying this is the best day of their lives.

I am proud of her, proud that she is so brave, happy she is excited to learn, but I know that soon she'll be in elementary school, and the next thing you know I'll be dropping her off at college.

In the meantime, what do I do with 4 hours to myself each week?

They Won't Leave Me Alone

The Onion Day's Bake-Off committee won't leave me alone! For the last 3 days I've had several phone calls, and messages, from various members of the Bake-Off committee.

"We haven't seen your entry yet. Are you planning to enter this year? You know, there's no late fee." And on and on and etc, etc, etc.

When I was finally at home for one of their phone calls, I told them why I'm not entering the competition this year.

1. It's on Labor Day. Again. I do not want to get up at the crack of dawn on a holiday and bake.

2. I lost all desire to bake when my mom died in March. I barely cook dinner right now.

3. I haven't baked anything since February when my mom got sick--I'm out of practice.

You think these reasons would keep the committee off my back, wouldn't you? Well, they're still calling. Good thing I have caller ID.

Why Potlucks Suck

So here's the problem with potlucks: if you don't make food assignments, you will end up with nothing but bags of chips and Great Value brand Oreos. Or worse. You might think I'm making this up, and I really wish I had taken a photo to prove it, but at a family reunion last year someone brought a jar of individually wrapped Slim Jims. And a gallon of milk. Milk! Not even chocolate milk. There was grape soda and regular milk and water to drink. That's it. And the food--well, let's just say Slim Jims weren't the scariest things on the table. I ate a roll, a few chips, and stopped at the Walker's on the way back through Price. It was scary.

At the last family reunion I went to--the one last week, not the one two weeks ago--I brought fresh, homemade Oatmeal Chocolate Chip cookies, aka The Best Cookies Ever. The other dessert? Zuchinni bread. Zuchinni bread. At a picnic. Yikes! There was one potato salad, two relish trays, and some baked beans which since my grandma made them you never know if there is dog hair in them or not. And that was pretty much it. Thank goodness my dad had just stocked up on Circle V steaks (mmm....steaks), and my brother Mike and I only slightly argued over which was a better seasoning, Onera or Montreal Steak, ending up settling for mixing the two together. And I brought some Lea and Perrins--which reminds me, that's at my Dad's house still. Good thing we're having chicken tonight--I can't eat a steak without Lea and Perrins. But I digress. One of my cousins brought turkey burgers. Turkey burgers! Ack...it looked like they were eating an albino.

But the worst potluck ever was at the end of a weeklong reunion on my husband's side. It had already been a tough week. All my brother-in-law did was watch I Dream of Jeannie. The condo had cable, and the Olympics were on, and he watched DVDs of I Dream of Jeannie. There are only 3 episodes of I Dream of Jeannie. The one where Jeannie gets jealous, the one where Jeannie gets the Major in trouble, and the other one where Jeannie gets the major in trouble. That's it. But we're talking about potlucks. There was already one potluck that week, where I brought some freshly baked cookies (albeit not from scratch since we were in Estes Park, CO and my stand mixer is in Payson), and my sister-in-law brought blue jello shots with swedish fish in them (yes, we did have a giggle fest and considered adding "special ingredients" but decided not to since they were for children, after all), and that was dessert. Someone brought a bowl of a pasta salad from a box that makes enough for 4 people. That was the only thing my daughter would eat. This wasn't the worst meal.

The worst was the final night when everyone threw together whatever they had. In the spirit of things, I contributed leftover breadsticks, grapes, carrots, chips and salsa. If I had remembered, I would have thrown in the Nutter Butters as well. Someone had Great Value Oreos. And Brent's uncle had been fishing all week, and he cooked the fish. There are two smells I can't stand without wanting/needing to hurl--fish and cinnamon. It was horrible. There were leftover salads, and someone decided to use up 2 dozen eggs by deviling them without paprika! I draw the line at deviled eggs without paprika. If you want to get fancy and put tarragon in them, that's one thing, but no salt, no pepper, no paprika deviled eggs--I thought they were going to scramble them. It was a disaster. We went back to our condo and ate dinner again.

I have one more reunion to go to this year. The same one that had Slim Jims last year. I haven't decided what I'm going to bring, but I'm not going to try too hard.

Smooth Ride

Lately I've been cruising around in my mom's car instead of my SUV. But before I ended up with my mom's car, I've been driving the car my husband usually drives--our '99 Nissan Sentra. Which was the car I picked out for myself, including all of the upgraded stereo components, down to the 12" sub in the trunk. But since having my daughter, I've been driving the lumbering ox...I mean '02 Dodge Durango. Which has a shake in it. And gets terrible gas mileage. And one of the speakers in the back isn't working. Due to the recent spike in gas prices, I've been driving the little car because I've been going further from home. So nice, such a smooth ride. So of course the antifreeze starts boiling, and it has to be in the shop. So my dad let me borrow my mom's car--well, I guess technically it's my dad's car since my mom died in March, but that's off topic. This car is a Dodge Intrepid. We call it the Canyonero because it's so honking big (two miles wide, seats 45, Canyonero). It drives great--but it's huge. And I'm used to driving a huge vehicle, just not one that's so close to the ground.

But it does ride smooth--a little too smooth. I took my daughter to get a haircut, and she was asleep before we got to Great Clips. There's always tomorrow.

My Life Revolves Around Poop

I'm not sure when it happened, but for some reason my whole life revolves around poop. My daughter is almost 3, and we're attempting to potty train. She'll make yellow in the little potty, but not brown. And at the risk of being gross, it usually is fairly pellet like, which is good and bad. Because for about a week, pellets would fall out of her diaper as I carried it to the bathroom to empty into the toilet. So then I'd find a poo pellet on the carpet, or the floor of the bathroom. The worst was when I found a dried up pellet on her changing table. You might think I should have changed the way I dealt with the diapers. In hindsight, that would have made sense. Although I have been paying better attention lately.

I've been changing diapers for almost 3 years now, and basically my whole day revolves around changing the baby---er, toddler. Change her again. Is that a smell? Does she need to be changed? And let's not forget picking up the doggy do on the lawn. We don't even have a dog! I've seen zoos that have cleaner cages than our yard.

There was even a 3 month window back in 2007 where my husband had a temporary colostomy bag, and while I didn't have to empty it out, I did have to help him attach the new one, and help clean the ostomy area. Let's just say I have a deep respect for anyone who goes into nursing as a career, and particularly the ostomy nurses. I think they should be paid more. In fact, anyone who has to deal with body fluids and or other related items should get paid a lot.

But that's off topic. I forsee a day, deep in the future, where my life no longer revolves on diaper changes, or if everyone has gone to the potty. Possibly in 20 years, when my darling daughter is graduating from college. I guess we'll see. In the meantime, I guess I'll continue to buy the big box of off-brand wipes at Wal-Mart, and if I have any sense, some plastic gloves as well.

My New Pet Peeve

I cannot stand it when people use the word Ginormous. It's not a word, and there are a myriad of reasons why. 1. If it was a word, spell check wouldn't flag it as a typo. 2. It's a hybrid of giant and enormous, which pretty much mean the same thing. That means it's redundant. I hate things that are redundant. 3. It's not a word! And I personally think that when businesses use it on signs, or writers for TV guide use it, they look stupid. That includes the essential oil shop in town. The only thing that would make it look stupider was using Comic Sans for the font on the sign. But that's not the point.

Because this makes me cringe, I have banned the use of the non-word ginormous from my house. I have forbidden by 2-year-old daughter from learning the non-word and using it. And really, I cringe when I hear this word.

Yes, I do realize that if you go to dictionary.com and check you will find ginormous listed. And yes, it lists the etymology of the word to the 40's. But, it still has a stupid definition, and it hasn't come into popular usage until the last year. Just because someone jumps off a cliff, doesn't mean we all jump off a cliff. Literary or literally.

While I'm mentioning non-words, it turns out agreeance is actually technically a word, although it is considered obsolete and of questionable parentage.

Socks

Why is it that every pair of socks I own has a hole in the heel? I buy socks all the time. I bought socks last week at Wal-Mart. And yet, not only can I not find two socks that match, I can't even find one sock without a hole in it.

This could be due to the fact that I hate to wear shoes, so I'm always running around in my socks. I'd run around in bare feet more, but the garage floor is generally cold, and it's bad enough going out there to get some ice cream out of the freezer without my feet freezing too. When I do go out barefoot, I have to do the frozen foot dance, which is tough when you're doing the frozen fingers juggle.

When I discover my socks have holes in them, I throw them away. If I wasn't buying new socks to replace them, I would understand why I have no socks. But I do replace them. Where is my bag of socks?

Good thing sandal weather is coming up. Now if I could only find two sandals that match each other...

Okay, It's Official

So after reading many, many blogs (too many) written by other people, and leaving many, many comments, I determined that I can be just as snarky as the next blogger, and I really need my own outlet for my own thoughts. Hence, I had to get my own blog. But every title I came up with was taken! Finally, I just used the first thing I heard that hadn't been used. Now I'm working my way through the layout options--setting up a blog has more work entailed than I thought. When do I get to the part where I get to make snarky comments? When can I rail about my new arch-foe, Bagel Lady? Oh, right, once I make sure everything is working on the blog. Got it.